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Growing upwardly, I really struggled with my identity. I was raised in a predominantly white suburb of Chicago as the child of Chinese immigrants, and was always left with a sense that I was dissimilar from my peers. When I started preschool, I couldn't even fully empathise English, and I was terrified. I became enlightened of how I couldn't effectively communicate with others, and as I got older and tried to notice myself, the struggle morphed into multiple identity crises involving my advent, my beliefs, my struggle with learning 2 languages, my social life, and even the nutrient I consume. How do you navigate assimilation without losing connection to your former civilisation?

Throughout all this, my parents accept always been there for me. They are my rocks; my solid ground to stand on and lean on for support. Every bit I've gotten older and reflected on my experiences, I've come to realize how much my family has shaped me. They accept taught me—through their words, actions, and personal experiences—some very important life lessons that I volition hold onto and hopefully pass forth to my own children.

I would say the way I've been raised is interesting. While it has many things in common with other immigrant children'south upbringing, parenting is extremely personal. As an adult, I now meet the choices and sacrifices my parents have made for the do good of their kids. I am extremely grateful for the foresight and self-sensation my parents accept that helped me to become who I am today.

Here are 10 lessons I've learned from my parents.

1. Hustle hard

Moving to a completely new state halfway beyond the earth is difficult—similar, really hard. My dad was determined to make a better life for himself and his family, and then he disrepair his ass to do and so, taking examination subsequently test and applying to graduate schools in the Us until he finally got accustomed. That was his ticket to success. only the hard work didn't stop there. He continued to work tirelessly, providing for our family of 4, doing his best and so that nosotros could alive comfortably. He'due south shown me the value of working hard for what you want in order to accomplish your dreams. It takes guts and it takes perseverance. Some of my biggest fears in life are failure and rejection; it's what stops me from making more daring decisions. But when I'1000 reminded of my family, I am able to attain inside of me and emulate their strength, finding myself reaching college and higher, taking steps to achieve my dreams.

2. Being strong in the confront of adversity

My parents experienced many atrocities throughout their childhoods and faced many difficult situations. They both grew upwards during a fourth dimension of civil unrest and survived a food shortage, essentially living in poverty. They didn't even have consistent access to electricity until they were out of college. That seems worlds away from the life in which I was raised, but never once have I ever heard my parents speak of their past with even a hint of bitterness. They keep their chins up and soldier on, looking forward to the hereafter, no affair what. I see true strength in them and they never neglect to remind me that people are capable of so much, and we can always work toward overcoming our struggles.

three. Health should ever come up first

The topic of wellness is a constant bespeak of chat in our household. My parents take drilled into my head that health comes earlier all else. Information technology'south very difficult to take proper care of our concern or others if we don't take care of ourselves—information technology makes it so much easier to become overwhelmed. My mom always uses the analogy that our bodies are like batteries that need charging. If y'all're depleted of all free energy, how can yous accomplish anything? If we're able, then we should take diligent intendance of ourselves through cleanliness, proper nutrition, exercise, and sleep (though I am definitely terrible at that last i, lamentable mom!). Through this constant reminder, I've come to better empathize the value of this and see the truth behind it. We all wear many hats and I definitely recollect I am a better person all around when I take intendance of myself. It'due south easier to be present and exist a proficient girl, friend, sister, educatee, and person overall.

4. Never stop learning

Something I learned very early from my parents is that "brains are like sponges." Nosotros are constantly learning things and we should never stop trying to. Knowledge is power, and no thing how old we get or what challenges we face up, we can always gain something—an insight, a new idea, more than understanding. They encouraged my curiosity, encouraging me to seek out the answers I wanted. My dad always gets so excited when I teach him something new, like a recipe or an interesting fun fact about a topic he doesn't normally think almost. I associate curiosity and the desire to learn with simply having enthusiasm for life.

5. Love can appear in many different forms

1 of the most important lessons I've learned from my parents and through our culture is how everyone may testify beloved differently. In some Eastern cultures, it is more than typical that we show honey through our actions rather than our words. My mom happily helping me with laundry or cooking food for me was an act of love, not simply an human action of obligation or devotion. But from living in the United States for so long, my parents have, over time, learned how to become more communicative as well. They've gotten much meliorate about verbalizing how they feel and I love seeing how they change and grow as people. That desire to connect with their kids through their words showed their dearest also. They wanted to bond with united states and express their love in a mode that their Westernized children could better sympathize. It shows that people all show dearest and amore in different ways—both culturally and individually.

6. Always cull kindness

My parents are 2 of the kindest, nearly generous people that I have ever known. They're e'er quick to offer a helping mitt or go out of their mode to assistance someone in need, and they never exercise annihilation with the expectation of having those favors be returned—they do it merely because they're good people. They have shown me that it doesn't matter your background, your socioeconomic status, whether you've had a bad twenty-four hours or non—you can always cull to exist kind. Information technology'due south taught me to ever seek out the silver lining of every single situation, even when at that place doesn't appear to be ane at first. They take ever emphasized that information technology's important to put positivity out into the globe and treat people well. In this sense, it's kind of like proficient karma. When I brand the effort to be positive in my thoughts, attitude, and beliefs, I tend to receive it back in the form of kindness from others and opportunities and it becomes a positive loop. Plus, you never know what someone else is going through and it's e'er worth it to try to brand someone'due south solar day.

7. Frugality

Of form, living a life of hardship leaves its marks on a person. Like many other immigrants, my family was very frugal. A sort of survival instinct was securely embedded in their daily lives and habits. There wasn't enough food to go around for a while, so they had to learn how to ration and share. New habiliment was a luxury and a rarity, so learning to mend fabric was a necessity. Stocking up on supplies when they were available and affordable was a means of survival. Though nosotros now live comfortably and don't demand to proceed upwardly some of these habits for survival, erstwhile habits die difficult, and they've passed on some of these instincts to me. I find myself doing things like avoiding too much nutrient waste material, using supplies similar paper towels and soap sparingly, and watching my water usage. Though it'southward not entirely necessary, learning the skill of frugality has been helpful to me. I've learned to residuum my spending between necessities and "wants," and information technology even helps me exist prepared in instance something like an emergency happens.

8. Choose your friends carefully

My mother was always extremely determined that I exist careful almost who I befriended. The people you are closest to most affect your evolution , personality, and behavior. She'd had her fair share of critics when it came to her choices over how she's led her life and her deportment. She's been criticized for how she tried to heighten her kids in a more moderate way, allowing usa to become more Westernized, and how she gave upwardly her career to move to another country, amongst other things. And honestly, who needs that kind of negative energy? We all deserve to exist surrounded by those who honey and support us.

9. How to bridge differences

Manifestly, growing upwards in a household trying to merge and navigate 2 different cultures tin be difficult. At times information technology'due south both frustrating and messy not being able to run into eye-to-eye on things, or not even be able to totally sympathize each other due to linguistic communication barriers. Throughout the years, nosotros've had to exercise lots of patience with each other and try to keep an open heed. As I've grown into myself, information technology'south become more than and more than apparent that many of our opinions differ drastically. Being able to hold conversations about contentious topics nosotros don't agree on can be very aggravating and emotional. We've gradually learned how to express those opinions without stepping on each others' toes as well much, and I recall this lesson has greatly aided me in my life in general. I love being able to talk to people who don't necessarily concord with me and being able to have a effective conversation about our opinions without offending each other.

x. Nutrient goes beyond simple nutrition

Eastern medicine was a major part of my upbringing. Every time something was physically incorrect with me, my parents tried to fix it with some batter of herbs. Honestly, sometimes information technology seems similar mumbo-jumbo, and to many people information technology probably is, but I've grown to have and respect it more and am quite fascinated by it. Some have get more interested in traditional Chinese medicine, and there have been more efforts to inquiry it. Information technology goes back thousands of years—and hey, I'm an gorging tea drinker anyway. What's the harm in drinking some tea that's supposedly good for me? It'south taught me that some of the foods we already consume can be used to purposely fuel and heal ourselves. For example, garlic has antimicrobial properties and chrysanthemum may aid to subtract inflammation . I was raised to believe we can use food to heal ourselves from the inside out, and I think that's kind of magical. Because of this, I'm very conscious of what types of foods I consume and pay very close attention to how it affects me. My female parent has given me some herbal teas, and truthfully, whenever I feel a common cold coming on, I always attain for them just in case. Perchance it's a placebo or perchance it really helps, simply I usually end upwards feeling better, and that's just fine with me.

What types of lessons have y'all learned from your family?